How many times have I heard people saying that? How many times do I think that to myself? Yet, in the past, when people have asked me what they should do, I have often been quite taken back when they have not followed my advice at all; and in a similar vein, when asking others what I should do, I have often been dissatisfied with their advice and gone on to do something quite different, or not acted at all.
My recent development in coaching has shown me a very different approach to this sort of situation. Coaching allows an individual to firstly really peel away all the layers that surround an issue/question/concern/uncertainty in their mind, so that they start to deal with what is at the heart of the matter rather than what is often some type of distraction, often placed there by the individual to avoid confronting something which is difficult or unpleasant to deal with. It can sometimes be an uncomfortable process as the coachee is made to look at a situation from angles which have perhaps been avoided. As a coach I find this in turn presents a challenge; it would be all too easy to move swiftly on, avoiding any discomfort, but by doing that the coach might not arrive at the heart of the matter. Skills such as rephrasing questions, allowing for silence, pushing for an answer and maintaining the delicate balance between challenge and support all help to move the coachee forward. I have found it particularly important to challenge the coachee’s perceptions in order for them to get a better grip of the reality.
The different stages of the coaching process allow the individual to sort out the confusion of thoughts in their mind, to identify where they want to go and to put into place a step-by-step plan of how to get there. During my coaching training and in subsequent coaching sessions I have learnt how the GROW model is an excellent structure for coaching. To start with I was overanxious about which stage I was at, but as I have practised, this process has become better internalised and my approach less mechanistic.
Coaching is amazingly empowering; it is like a guided journey where we make all the choices and having arrived at the conclusion ourselves we are much more likely to act upon the decisions we have made. I feel that coaching constitutes a very powerful tool which can be used in a range of situations and will be very effective within a school context. It has helped me personally and professionally to become more focused and to be able to manage many aspects of my job and life in a more efficient way. I see it as an empowering thinking skill, which if developed in people offers them a tool to help them realise their own potential. I would very much like now to develop my coaching skills further and to share what I have gained over this year with as many other people as possible. I would like to build up a coaching culture in the school and in the region. There remain many challenges and questions: how do I really embed coaching within the working environment? How do I get people to understand the value of coaching? Should I consider being an external or an internal coach? There are concerns with credibility and with confidentiality. However, it is up to me to meet those challenges and not to allow them to become blocks!
For more information please email Judy Brotherton.
In association with Education Scotland